Prayers

Here is this week’s column, written last week, back when my biggest worry was a cranky two-year-old. These same people I’m writing about here are the ones who are now cooking meals for us, which is a blessing. Note to self (and to you): when people offer their help, take it!

Each week our family gathers with neighbors to have a cookout or do a fun activity or simply get together and pray.

One recent week, the adults of our group gathered to spend some time in prayer and reflection. At the end of our gathering, we went around the room to mention prayer intentions, what was on our heart or what we had been struggling with lately and how others could pray for us.

Across the room from me that night sat a wonderful man who has spent the last year battling a serious illness. He is just ending treatments and starting to feel better and it is so encouraging to see him on the mend. When it was his turn to ask for prayers, he said he really didn’t have anything.

What he wanted, he said, was to just thank God for how good he had been to his family. He was grateful for how far he had come, for how good he was feeling. He was mostly just in awe of all the prayers that had already been offered during his illness. God’s love and mercy was so clear to him through our willingness to pray.

A few weeks earlier, this same friend had offered the opening prayer at our school’s annual 5K fundraiser, and something he said stuck with me. It was simple: he thanked God that we were all there, alive on that day. It was not melodramatic, just sincere. Through his illness, he was aware of something we too often take for granted — the gift of life, the joy of this day. In the midst of the daily grind, we can easily get caught up in the frustrations of the moment and sometimes miss the big picture.

That night at our prayer gathering, when it was my turn to ask for prayer, I must admit I got pretty pedestrian. The last few days had been very trying for me, particularly with a toddler who hadn’t been feeling well. I had spent those days holding a very fussy little boy, non-stop, and even when there is grace, things can get intense.

When I asked for prayers, I suppose I could have masked my frustration. Part of me wanted to say that I was just overwhelmed at the goodness of God in my life. But the truth was those few days had been some of the most trying in recent history, and I felt stretched very, very thin. If I had said all was well with my world, I would have been lying. So I admitted that things were tough.

Later that evening, after I got home, I started feeling a bit sheepish about my prayer request. It seemed so self-centered, so self-indulgent. Maybe I should have stepped back and looked at the many things I had going well at that moment, instead of telling everyone how frustrated and emotional I was with a cranky child.

But here is where we find the balance between being real with those we love and trust and also being positive and aware of all God has given us. The ideal, it seems to me, is to be willing to do some of each.

That evening at our gathering, I found joy and inspiration from my friend. He is a man with deep faith, and God is doing wonderful things for him and his family in the midst of a very difficult season. While my friend is quick to thank God he has also been willing to admit that this season has been hard, and that he desperately needs – and utterly appreciates – the prayers of so many people.

We each are on our own path towards heaven. During our journey on Earth, some seasons will present unique challenges. Even the rest of the time, the very good times, there will be days that are so much harder than others. It’s okay to admit that.

On that evening, one man rejoiced at the beginning of a new and healthy season, while a tired-out momma asked for prayers to just get through the day. How wonderful, I realized later, to have friends that could offer the same care and concern to us both.