What We Think

Weekly column
Life with a daughter is certainly a new experience for us, and everyday we learn a little bit more about having a girl in our midst.

Paul and I are asked a lot of questions, now that Isabel is here, and these questions tend to be similar in nature. People want to know what it’s like for us with a girl, what the boys think about their sister, and can we already point out some of the many differences between a boy and a girl (people also want to know when we’re piercing her ears, to which I answer “no time soon!”)

When Isabel was first born and people would ask these questions, I didn’t have good answers. The main reason for my lack of response was, of course, my lack of sleep. Going on fumes is not conducive to coming up with concise, well-thought answers to questions like “how do you think your life will change with a girl,” or even “what’s her name again?”

Sleep deprivation makes every question seem complicated.

But now we are nearing the three-month mark and my wits are about me. I finally have a few thoughts on these matters, answers for those who see our family with so many sons now blessed with a sweet little girl.

It is important to note that having our daughter after five boys means Paul and I have no idea what we are getting into. People will ask, through laughter, if we’ve started to note the differences between boys and girls; the answers we give lead me to believe we’ve only scratched the surface.

“Oh, she is so different,” I will say, staring at my daughter’s dainty lips. “She does things like hold out her pinky, even in her sleep, and she always keeps her hand propped up sweetly below her chin.” People will say, of course, “just you wait.”

Another question people consistently ask is how the boys like their sister. Now that some time has gone by, I can honestly say that they love her. When she smiles, they smile right back. When she laughs, they all come running.

The boys are in love.

A few weeks ago, I don’t know that this was the case. They loved their sister of course. It’s just that she had some opinions that made everyday living a challenge – the main issue being she didn’t like the car so much.

When we all loaded up, she would cry. There was no stopping her – she knew where she wanted to be, and in the car seat was not it. A baby crying can be a very stressful sound, and I think it felt a bit unrelenting to the boys at times.
Now that Isabel is over her car seat hatred, we can all relax a bit; we are now able to sit back and enjoy the ride.

And that is true across the board – we are enjoying the ride. We are through those first, very intense weeks of life with a newborn. Isabel is bigger now, sturdier and much less intimidating to hold. There is not that same fear of somehow breaking this tiny creature, because she is not quite so tiny anymore.

There is a lot of freedom in this new stage. We no longer have a newborn; she is now an infant.

Imagine my surprise, then, to discover I am just a little sad at the thought. I have spent the last ten weeks watching my daughter like a hawk, eager for her to grow a bit, to be strong and steady and now that we are here, I miss (just a bit) those days of the wee tiny babe.

But onward and upward! Our sweet girl is only just beginning to reveal all the change – the beauty and delight – that she will continue to bring into our oh-so-lucky family.