Overheard: Your signature move stinks.
Thursday, July 24, 2008
A Year of Henry
Weekly column
Sweet precious Henry celebrated his first birthday last week and I’m still trying to decide if he just got here or if I’ve known him forever.
In some ways, this year has flown by and I cannot believe how big our baby has gotten. In other ways, it has crept along as I celebrate each new day and week that gets me a little closer to full recovery and successful word retrieval.
A few days before his birthday, Henry was playing in the front room. Elliott walked over to him and put his cheek on Henry’s head.
“I’m touching the head of the man who changed my life,” said Elliott.
“How’s that,” I asked him.
“He’s made it so much better,” said Elliott.
In our family, having a baby in the house has certainly brought our boys an increased capacity for love and tenderness. Of course they have always been the boy version of sweet and loving, but Henry has brought even more of that sweetness into our home.
Often, when we are out running errands, strangers will comment on all the boys, and on us having a baby with these four older siblings. Yes, I explain, we had the first four very close, and then we waited almost six years to have another.
I leave it at that and skip the details of how when baby Augie came along I decided that four boys in five years was plenty, that Paul’s and my gig as a co-creators with God was officially over. I had met my match and reached my limit and these four boys were all I had the grace to handle.
For a while, that was certainly true. Those years of so many babies and toddlers were a wild and crazy (and mostly fun) blur. It seemed like the days would last forever, that I would always be the frenzied woman chasing four boy-cubs who were determined to go in my opposite direction. Some Sundays I wondered if Paul and I would ever sit in the same section of the church again. “One day,” I would think, “I’ll actually hear the Gospel and the homily.”
And then, one day, I did.
One day I could sit for longer spells, read a book a bit longer, go to the store without fear of a wine display being knocked over (though I’m still not totally convinced). Over time, things got easier. My boys started getting older and more independent and I began to enjoy some of the peace and tranquility I had long prayed for. We were baby- and toddler-free and things were a lot easier.
I enjoyed this beautiful season, indeed. But instead of feeling like I had arrived, I realized that I wasn’t ready to stay here forever, not yet. How sweet, I thought, to have a small hand to hold, to have someone to carry and comfort, to push in a swing or tote on a walk. While there is certainly continued wonder in each stage of life, I suddenly realized I didn’t want to say goodbye to the precious years of having a baby in the house.
I know Henry won’t stay little forever – one day he’ll be big and independent like his brothers. He will keep me on my toes and drive me to frustration and maybe even outgrow being held by his daddy.
But for now, he is our one-year-old baby. Henry is a delight, and he has brought an incredible richness to our family. He gives us an excuse to kiss and cuddle and profess our unyielding devotion.
Even more than all this, Henry is a soul that will last for all eternity. Thank you God for giving us the grace to be open to another baby – life without Henry would not be nearly as sweet.
Tuesday, July 22, 2008
Of All The Whale Books...
...on all the shelves, in all the libraries, I pick the one that has a *photo* of the extended private parts of a Gray Whale. Which, incidentally, looks to be the size of our Suburban (that's the boys' theory anyway).
I can pick 'em.
Monday, July 21, 2008
Two Questions
We can call this one You're So Money Monday! even though I have two extremely specific questions this week.
1. Do you have a delicious recipe for pistachio cake? Someone has a birthday this week, and this is what he requests. Of course I've found a gajillion recipes online, but I'd like to speak with a professional.
2. Have you ever done a sprint triathlon? If so, what is your suggestion for practical attire?
Thanks!
Friday, July 18, 2008
Slowing Down
Weekly column
One recent morning, I got up early and deliberately did nothing. Instead of switching over laundry or making coffee or going to exercise, I walked over to my favorite chair in the front room and sat down. The house was peaceful and calm, and while I had a laundry list of things I could be doing, I had an urge to quiet myself.
I sat and tried not to think about the cares of the day, of where we would go and what we do. I said good morning to God, and instead of going on and on, I stopped talking so he could say hello back. In the still of the morning, my soul felt deeply connected to Christ.
A few minutes later, eight-year-old Charlie wandered down the stairs. He walked over to me and curled up next to me. He burrowed his head in my arm. We sat quietly for over twenty minutes, saying nothing and everything all at once.
Eventually, everyone else woke up and came downstairs and the quiet ended. The day began and off we went.
I have an ideal of summer, a vision of how a summer day should look and feel. Summer, to me, involves a pace that is much slower than the rest of the year, a luxury, but really one of those luxury’s you can’t afford to miss.
Slowing down affords a necessary reboot. The older the boys get, the faster we all seem to move. Life is now filled with a variety of wonderful and very good activities, but moving at that speed non-stop is a recipe for burnout.
And so, we have these months out of school with fewer places to go and less to do – in theory. Because summer is still filled with plenty to do. Families enjoy baseball or swim team, vacation and vacation bible school. There are summer camps and day trips and a whole host of exciting things to do.
If I’m not careful, I realized a few weeks ago, summer could have all the rest and relaxation of a normal school week – not a whole lot.
When I picture a perfect summer day, I see the boys sitting in the front room reading quietly or building a fort. I see me sipping a drink while I read a book. Maybe we’re all playing cards or creating art or just sitting in the backyard eating watermelon from the farmer’s market.
In my life, throughout each day, I want peace and tranquility. Sometimes I actually get it. But sometimes I am scurrying around the house, directing each boy in the direction I want him to go. “Go read,” I say in a hurried tone, “Go play with Legos.” When I am frantic, it inspires no one to want to slow down and relax.
How can my house chill out, I ask myself, if I’m unable to do the same?
In The Cloud of Unknowing, the author talks of our soul’s quest for God. The book is a practical guide to contemplation written by an unknown mystic from the 14th century. In it, he focuses on our need to connect with our Creator, and how we can find that connection through quieting ourselves before God.
“This is what you are to do,” writes the author, “lift your heart up to the Lord, with a gentle stirring of love desiring him for his own sake and not for his gifts…[I]f you strive to fix your love on him forgetting all else…I am confident that God in his goodness will bring you a deep experience of himself.”
Sometimes, I realized that morning with Charlie, the best way to get the peace you desire is to sit and wait. And then the peace will come to you.
Thursday, July 17, 2008
Double Prizes!
Don't forget to head over to the new Faith and Family website to register for big drawings! with lots of stuff! I'm pretty sure you can enter as many times as you want, and there are at least 80 prizes with all kinds of cool things. I hope you win.
The bad news is you only have until Monday. The good news is these creepy shoes are not one of the prizes.
Wednesday, July 16, 2008
Tuesday, July 15, 2008
If My Husband Had A Website
There are some discussions we have around this household, discussions you surely have around your household as well, that I just feel funny discussing here on this blog. Because I'm a laaaady, and ladies "don't talk like that." I put these last words in quotes because the truth is, while that is the understanding, once you have boys it is no longer the reality. It's not that I enjoy some of these discussions, but we have them nonetheless.
All that is to say: there are things that only a dad can write about. And since I'm a mom of boys, I'll let this dad handle it.
Mama's Got a Brand New Gig!
Faith and Family Magazine has a new website, and I'm pleased to announce that I'll be doing a little blogging over there with a handful of other wonderful ladies. One thing I'm excited about is a weekly feature I'll provide, called Rachel Raves. If you have any products or style thoughts you'd like to share, please email me!
So go check out the new place, and I hope you like it!
Pity the Fool
Elliott: Mama, where'd you put my Elvin Hayes book?
Me: Who's that?
Elliott: You don't know who Elvin Hayes is?
Me: No.
Elliott: Dang, I feel sorry for you.
(note: I know who Alvin Hayes is, but not Elvin.)
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